Author Topic: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life  (Read 519 times)

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Offline hailie877

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  • Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « on: January 11, 2020, 11:39:59 PM »
    Hi All,

    I am a female born on 9 Oct 1987, 5.06pm
    In Singapore.

    I once had a reading with a master and he said my marriage is not good, will clash (冲). I do think what he said was quite true. Even though I have been married for 4.5 years and I do feel quite contented in my marriage life most of the times, I seldom quarrel with my husband, but when we do, it can be a HUGE one, like a volcano erupt. He is actually quite hot tempered and because of his temper I had to put up with his bad attitude many times. When he treats me poorly I am actually very upset and hurt deep inside but I keep trying to endure. As time goes by these feelings of disappointment and anger built up inside me and I often have thoughts of divorce. I  wonder how long i can put up with him and if our marriage could really last.

    My husband was born 9 Feb 1983.

    I hope someone can give me some insight on my love life with my bazi chart as attached. Thank you.


    « Last Edit: January 12, 2020, 12:10:38 AM by hailie877 »

    Offline rainmaster

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #1 on: January 12, 2020, 09:06:23 AM »
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    Offline hailie877

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #2 on: January 12, 2020, 10:58:24 AM »
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    Since you're born in Singapore, I use Bing Shen hour, because Singapore use adjusted time.

    Your husband seems to be a stubborn person. Both of you have hot temper, and can erupt when angry. There are some disagreement because your character and his character aren't fully compatible. Because both of you have temper issue, a small problem can become a big problem.

    Where (at which direction) does your head pointing when you sleep? Where (which direction) does the balcony of your apartment facing? Which sectors/directions of your home have external windows?

    My head pointing SE when i sleep..external windows facing SW and balcony facing NE.
    You are right, my partner has quite stubborn personality.

    Offline rainmaster

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #3 on: January 12, 2020, 05:00:30 PM »
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    Offline hailie877

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #4 on: January 13, 2020, 10:40:52 PM »
    @rainmaster

    Thank you for the advice.

    Do you think my marriage can last based on my bazi?
    If I choose divorce, can I meet someone better in future?


    Offline tureno

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #5 on: January 14, 2020, 12:03:35 AM »
    Helo,

    Hmm actually the master are not wrong,but in general terms of bazi all of us will get clash every hour,day,month or year as in our natal chart.

    But u married with him for 4.5 half years including courtship?

    Have you look back or talk about this?What causes this change?

    What if your hubby dont want to divorce? What would you do?




    Offline hailie877

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #6 on: January 14, 2020, 12:16:54 AM »
    @tureno

    we been married for 4.5 years. If including years of courtship is more than 10 years.
    Before marrying to him I am already aware of his bad temper. It is just as years gone by the feelings of unhappiness built up and it makes me look forward to meeting someone better I guess. But I havent met that person yet. I would seriously consider divorcing my partner if I really met someone better.

    Offline rainmaster

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #7 on: January 14, 2020, 07:08:05 AM »
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    Offline PoHeYou

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #8 on: January 14, 2020, 04:40:11 PM »
    Actually I feel you already have a direction of what you want to do, and it seems like you posting here is merely an effort of your end to find justification of what you have done and will be doing.

    In any case, intuition says that once 2020 starts, you would be able to meet different men however it is not known that they will be a suitable one.

    If there exist any hope in continuing this marriage, maybe you can share about whether there were some distance between you and your husband in 2017, perhaps 2nd half 17? emotionally/physically (time spent together).

    Lastly, do you recall the times when he was there for you during a difficult period?

    Offline hailie877

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #9 on: January 14, 2020, 08:05:13 PM »
    @PoHeYou

    Perhaps is recently I've endured too much of his bad attitude so it leads me to thinking whether my marriage can really last..like what if one day I burst out at him, then what would it lead to. I am also hot tempered person just that almost all the time I am the one giving in. Emotionally I am almost reaching a point where if he show me bad attitude again I may really burst, and I may pack my bag and leave the house.

    From what I can recall I don't think there was emotional /physical distance between us in 2017. But 2016 there was, for about a month where he was stationed overseas due to work.

    @rainmaster
    Thank you for the advice. I know both our bad temper is something we have to overcome.

    Offline lilac_adv

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #10 on: January 15, 2020, 01:26:36 AM »
    Hi hailie877,

    He did not lie to you who he is before marriage. If you get into a marriage with him, you have chosen to accept him. Why just decide impulsively he is not the one for you now? Be honest and speak up about how you truly feel on his issue and how it is affecting the marriage. See how he respond and act. Don't be unfair and deprive him of the chance that he could want to work on it and be better for the marriage. Of course, don't expect miracle. Habits die hard. Give it time, more time. Marriage is a commitment and hard work that most people nowadays just carelessly trash it aside without a second thought or glance. Thinking the grass on the other side is greener. It show your immaturity in handing someone's heart and commitment very carelessly. When you want to return after finding out other choices are not what you want, by that time, it is too late. You and your husband had 10 long years of courtship and 4.5 years of marriage, doesn't it mean anything beside your husband's temper? Both of you come a long way, so cherish what you had. Like what other master said, who will know if the next one will be better than your husband? He might be worse off. No one will advice divorce here. It's bad karma. You decide what you want to do with your marriage.


    « Last Edit: January 15, 2020, 01:38:42 AM by lilac_adv »

    Offline PoHeYou

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #11 on: January 15, 2020, 09:18:35 AM »
    @PoHeYou

    Perhaps is recently I've endured too much of his bad attitude so it leads me to thinking whether my marriage can really last..like what if one day I burst out at him, then what would it lead to. I am also hot tempered person just that almost all the time I am the one giving in. Emotionally I am almost reaching a point where if he show me bad attitude again I may really burst, and I may pack my bag and leave the house.

    From what I can recall I don't think there was emotional /physical distance between us in 2017. But 2016 there was, for about a month where he was stationed overseas due to work.


    That's the issue, by giving in or enduring, you are harming the relationship because it creates a false view of perceived harmony instead of actual harmony.
    But I suspect there are deeper reasons and motivations as to why you chose to endure, be mindful you can't have the good without the bad, it is never too late to redirect and guide how someone treats you except it will take greater willpower at this junction.

    Are you aware of the values you stand for? Is he aware of the values you stand for? Have you expressed that you don't stand for that treatment? Have you expressed not with words but actions? Because if your any of the answer is No, there is a high chance that you are coming from a reactive angle instead of one which actively set the tones and pace. And when you don't learn to take charge, you are akin to a boat without a captain in the sea, wherever the wind blows your sails, where you go, it is likely the same issue will repeat. History repeats.

    Anyway, your request feels like you have not given up on him, but yourself and your ability to remain passively. Find your center and be mindful of your thoughts, maybe then you will find clarity.

    Before using Bazi as a reference for best actions, work on yourself, don't discount your ability to change.

    Offline lilac_adv

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  • Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #12 on: January 15, 2020, 06:20:07 PM »
    @PoHeYou

    Perhaps is recently I've endured too much of his bad attitude so it leads me to thinking whether my marriage can really last..like what if one day I burst out at him, then what would it lead to. I am also hot tempered person just that almost all the time I am the one giving in. Emotionally I am almost reaching a point where if he show me bad attitude again I may really burst, and I may pack my bag and leave the house.

    From what I can recall I don't think there was emotional /physical distance between us in 2017. But 2016 there was, for about a month where he was stationed overseas due to work.


    That's the issue, by giving in or enduring, you are harming the relationship because it creates a false view of perceived harmony instead of actual harmony.
    But I suspect there are deeper reasons and motivations as to why you chose to endure, be mindful you can't have the good without the bad, it is never too late to redirect and guide how someone treats you except it will take greater willpower at this junction.

    Are you aware of the values you stand for? Is he aware of the values you stand for? Have you expressed that you don't stand for that treatment? Have you expressed not with words but actions? Because if your any of the answer is No, there is a high chance that you are coming from a reactive angle instead of one which actively set the tones and pace. And when you don't learn to take charge, you are akin to a boat without a captain in the sea, wherever the wind blows your sails, where you go, it is likely the same issue will repeat. History repeats.

    Anyway, your request feels like you have not given up on him, but yourself and your ability to remain passively. Find your center and be mindful of your thoughts, maybe then you will find clarity.

    Before using Bazi as a reference for best actions, work on yourself, don't discount your ability to change.

    Totally agree with PoHeYou. It takes two to clap. People can always ask for advice. Whether one make the changes or not, it's up to them. It takes time, work and patience. Marriage may not be forever but is lifelong commitment work for two people, which many do not understand when they get into it. You might be having doubts, bad mood and just lazy today. But pick yourself up tomorrow and do the work. This is just life. Nothing is guarantee. But with no effort and work, it is a guarantee to fail. You are not happy, so why not at least make the changes and see where it lead you to. Be accountable to no one but yourself. When you give your 100% to make it work and it still fail, at least when you leave, you know you did your best and tried to save it but couldn't due to the other person refusing to change. By that time, you clear your debt, you need to learn the lesson you came to learn, the future will be something different waiting for you. Wishing you the best in your changes and hope that your husband is willing to work for the marriage and everything he used to have with you, that he learn to cherish and understand that nothing and no one should be taken for granted.
    « Last Edit: January 15, 2020, 06:22:09 PM by lilac_adv »

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    Re: Pls read my bazi and give insight on my love life
    « Reply #12 on: January 15, 2020, 06:20:07 PM »
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